When & How to Ask About Dating Exclusively?

Posted by admin on June 7, 2008

Well, conduct an exclusivity talk is an option.

I know it’s not easy but you got to do it eventually. When is the right time? Either use your gut feel or look for telling signs and cues that the the other person feels the same way.

“Your relationship should speak for itself in a certain way,” says Robin Gorman Newman, author of How to Marry a Mensch. “How you feel between dates is as important as how you feel on your dates. If you’re nervous, unsure, don’t hear from the other person when you thought you would, or when that person said he or she would call—you might want to prepare yourself for the worst.”

There should be no fear talking about it. Come on, exclusivity does not mean engagement, and it is certainly not marriage! It just means you’re starting to trust each other, and you can still work out what, besides not having sex with other people, “exclusive” means for you.

“You can put it this way,” says Catherine Cardinal, author of A Cure for the Common Life. “You can say: ‘I’m the kind of person who doesn’t have sex with someone unless I know it’s exclusive, and I want to know if that’s the kind of person you are, too.”

Whatever it is, choose the right spot to talk about this exclusivity thingy. You don’t want to do it when you are heavily into kissing and petty. Why? Hey, you will be at the mercy of your hormones!